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We put the "quiz" in "inquisition."
Greetings and welcome back to another issue of Cranial Insertion! This Thursday is Thanksgiving in the US, and many of our readers like the occasional quiz article, so I decided to give you a quiz article so that you have at least this one thing to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
If you have questions you'd like us to answer, please email them to moko@cranialinsertion.com or tweet short questions at @CranialTweet. One of our writers will get back to you with an answer, and your question might even appear in a future issue.
And now, grab a turkey leg and some cranberry sauce, and let's take this quiz!
A: Cast it for .
B: Cast it for .
C: Suspend it for .
D: Suspend it for .
E: Sigh wistfully and lament your fate.
The answer is...
E, actually.
Yes, the sad answer is that you can't do anything with the exiled Wheel of Fate. You can't cast it because it has an unpayable cost and Gonti doesn't give it an alternative cost to cast it. You can't suspend it, either, because it's not in your hand.
Changeling is a characteristic-defining ability that gives the card all creature types. It doesn't give the creature all possible subtypes. Equipment and Vehicle are artifact types, not creature types, even though Vehicles can become creatures. Shrine is an enchantment type, so a changeling doesn't get that subtype either. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle doesn't work because subtypes are single words, and Teenage is not a supported creature type.
A: Shock gets exiled face-down and returns to the battlefield face-down.
B: Shock gets exiled face-up and stays in the exile zone.
C: Shock gets exiled face-up and returns to the battlefield face-up. State-based actions move it to the graveyard.
D: Shock gets exiled face-up and returns to the battlefield face-up. You choose a target and cast Shock for free.
E: Shock gets exiled face-up and returns to the battlefield face-up as a 2/2 instant creature.
The answer is...
B.
As amusing as options D or E would be, the rules simply don't allow an instant or sorcery card to enter the battlefield, not even for a nanosecond. That's also why C is not the correct answer.
When a card gets exiled, it gets exiled face-up by default, which is why A is not correct, either. The only remaining choice is B: You exile the card face up, see that it's an instant, so it stays in the exile zone because the game won't allow you to put it onto the battlefield.
Master of Puppets
I'm pulling your strings
Q: You control two Marionette Masters and four Servo tokens. All six creatures die in combat at the same time. How much life does your opponent lose, assuming both Marionette Masters' power is 1?
A: The choices are...
A: That depends on the order in which you put the creatures into the graveyard.
B: 0
C: 4
D: 8
E: 15
F: 16
G: 23
H: 42
The answer is...
D.
Marionette Master has an ability that triggers when something, namely an artifact you control, leaves the battlefield. Unlike other triggers that look at the game state after an event to see if they triggered, such a trigger looks back in time to the game state before the event. In other words, permanents that leave the battlefield at the same time see each other leaving for the purpose of triggered abilities.
Each of the two Marionette Masters sees four Servos leave the battlefield, so you get eight triggers for 1 life loss each, which means that your opponent loses 8 life.
Q: Which of these abilities are affected by Panharmonicon?
A: The choices are...
A: Emrakul, the Promised End's "gain control of target opponent" ability.
B: Lotus Cobra's landfall ability when its controller plays Dryad Arbor.
C: Fabricate
D: Endless One's "enters the battlefield with X +1/+1 counters on it" ability.
E: Your ability to win the game.
The answer is...
B and C.
Panharmonicon's ability affects only triggered abilities, which begin with the words "when," "whenever," or "at." This rules out Endless One's ability, which is a static ability that creates a replacement effect that changes how Endless One enters the battlefield.
Additionally, the ability has to be triggered by a creature or an artifact entering the battlefield under your control. Emrakul's ability is not triggered by Emrakul or anything else entering the battlefield. It's triggered by casting Emrakul, so Panharmonicon doesn't care about that ability.
Fabricate is a keyword ability that's a shorthand notation for a creature's enter-the-battlefield ability. As such, Panharmonicon makes it more awesome.
Lotus Cobra's landfall ability does get triggered by Dryad Arbor entering the battlefield, so Panharmonicon makes it trigger an additional time even though the words "creature" or "artifact" don't actually appear in Lotus Cobra's trigger condition.
Q: You control two Panharmonicons, and two Essence Wardens enter the battlefield at the same time. How much life do you gain?
A: The choices are...
A: 2
B: 4
C: 6
D: 8
E: Who do we appreciate?
The answer is...
C.
Each Essence Warden sees the other entering the battlefield, so they trigger each others' abilities. Each Panharmonicon makes each ability trigger an additional time, so each ability triggers three times. (Note that Panharmonicon does not double the number of triggers!) Two abilities times three triggers times 1 life each yields a total life gain of 6. Whew!
Q: Which of these fall off a crewed Ballista Charger at the end of the turn?
At the end of the turn, Ballista Charger stops being a creature, so the Equipment and the Aura can no longer stay attached to it. State-based actions unattach the Equipment and put the Aura into the graveyard. Any counters that were on the Vehicle stay on it because there is no rule that removes them and no rule that dictates what kinds of counters can be on what kinds of permanents. The +1/+1 counters won't do anything while the Vehicle is not a creature, but their effect will kick in again when the Vehicle gets crewed again.
How can we dance
When our earth is turning
How do we sleep
While our beds are burning
Q: You control a Midnight Oil that has one hour counter left on it. Which of these things happen in your draw step?
A: The choices are...
A: You lose the game.
B: You sacrifice Midnight Oil.
C: You remove the last counter from Midnight Oil.
D: You draw an additional card.
E: You burn the Midnight Oil.
The answer is...
C and D.
When Midnight Oil's ability resolves, you follow the instructions in the ability as much as possible. You can draw a card, so you do that. You can't remove two counters, so you do as much as possible and remove the last counter. There is no consequence for failing to remove two counters, so you don't lose the game and you don't sacrifice Midnight Oil. However, your maximum hand size is now zero, so you might wish that you could sacrifice Midnight Oil in order to get your hand size back to normal.
Q: You control Graf Rats that's equipped with Spy Kit. What happens to Graf Rats at the beginning of combat?
A: The choices are...
A: Nothing.
B: You exile Graf Rats and return it to the battlefield face-down as a 2/2 creature.
C: You exile Graf Rats and it stays exiled.
D: You exile Graf Rats and return it to the battlefield as the top half of Chittering Host. Since this half can't exist on its own, it's put into the graveyard by state-based actions.
E: You exile Graf Rats and return it to the battlefield as a 2.5/3 half-Chittering Host.
The answer is...
C.
At the beginning of combat, the triggered ability checks whether you own and control Graf Rats and a creature named Midnight Scavengers. Since Graf Rats has all conceivable names, it is also a creature named Midnight Scavengers, so the single Graf Rats meets both conditions for the triggered ability. When the ability resolves, you do as much as you can, so you start by exiling the Graf Rats. You're then told to meld the exiled cards into Chittering Host, but you can't do that because you don't have both halves of Chittering Host, so the Graf Rats stays exiled. Poor Graf Rats.
Q: In a Commander game, at what times can you put your commander into the command zone?
A: The choices are...
A: If it would go to the graveyard.
B: If it would go into exile.
C: If it would go into your library.
D: If it would go into your hand.
E: Whenever you want.
The answer is...
A, B, C, and D.
For much of the Commander variant's history, the answer was just A and B. However, effects that tuck a commander into a library were too powerful under that rules, so eventually the rule was modified to also apply if the commander would be put into your library or into your hand.
And that's it for today's quiz. How many questions did you get right? If you got all ten questions right, Moko would love to have you for dinner some time. Err, I mean, Moko would love to have you over for dinner some time. Yeah, that sounds better.
At any rate, thanks for reading and participating in this week's issue. I hope you have a pleasant week, and please come back next week for another helping of Magic rules questions and answers.
-Carsten Haese
About the Author: Carsten Haese is a former Level 2 judge based in Toledo, OH. He is retired from active judging, but he still writes for Cranial Insertion and helps organize an annual charity Magic tournament that benefits the National MS Society.
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